For some reason, things are clicking this week. Every training session has been nothing short of brilliant. I took a deload week and I think that break from heavy lifting also helped clear the proverbial weight in my head. It's true: deload weeks help reset the central nervous system. And boy howdy was in need of that.
I'm just over 7 weeks out from my meet, and I've fallen in love with every inch of this process. My body is tired. The muscles in my legs frequently spasm as I lay in bed at night, trying to go to sleep. I've grown used to their little jumps, will point it out to my partner occasionally. The skin jumps and sinks in quickly, little blinks. I love how solid my lifts have become, how heavy the weight. Nowadays I also like eating two lunches, drinking protein shakes, scooping out tiny lumps of creatine. There is ritual and beauty to it. There is also really hard work. Going to the gym when I don't feel well. Going when I'd rather get something else done, or nothing done in particular. Shit, sometimes I want to simply
do nothing. My diet is a carousel of sameness: chicken breast, tuna, rice, spinach, sweet potatoes, eggs. Holy crap can I put some eggs away. I eat at least 3 a day.
But this is a commitment, and commitment often requires a certain amount of sacrifice. I feel really good about it. I'm still very nervous about April, but I know it's coming and I will be ready.
I want to remember this part of it. The not so great days and the incredible weeks where it all comes together and I hit my numbers. I want to remember the drives home from the workouts, always exhausted and a grin slapped on my face. The little moments between the big ones. The coworkers that make fun of me for "eating weird," when really all I do is eat healthy. The night I first tried on my singlet and never, ever wanted to take it off.
It's one fantastic, slightly ludicrous ride. More soon.
